I have a bad habit of getting distracted before I complete tasks. The type of task doesn’t matter, artwork, housework, work-work– it all falls prey to whatever interruptions pop-up. Sometimes those interruptions are my brain…
Hmm, I feel like crap, I to stop goofing off on Facebook and grab some allergy meds from the bedroom…
Oh look, I need to do a load of laundry in the basement…
Oh yeah, I was going to do a full change on the litter box today but the new litter is in the car…
Oh geeze, the car is trashed, no way I can take Shiva out dogwalking later today in this, I need to clean it out but the garbage bags are in the kitchen…
Whoops, forgot to check the mail yesterday…
Omg the ants are back in the mailbox! Wait I have the ant traps in the car…
May as well clean this out while I’m here…
Oh yeah the trunk needs to be unloaded too…
Okay awesome, car is cleaned, trunk is unloaded, catbox is changed, laundry is started, mail is checked… time to goof on Facebook!
…Hmm, I feel like crap, I need to grab some allergy meds…
And sometimes it’s just the normal day-to-day interruptions that everyone deals with. The problem is this makes my head a very frustrating place to live when I want to get a specific thing done. Unless my magic laser-focus-obsession-o-vision kicks in, there isn’t much of a chance I’m going to remember what I’m doing.
So I make lists.
Which only serve to remind me of all the things I started and didn’t finish.
Which stupidly makes me more likely to start new projects than pick up old ones… because that’s admitting I didn’t finish them? I dunno. Dammit brain!
I’m not sure what the solution is, but I’m thinking one of my Nerd Fitness goals this challenge needs to be finding one. Or at least experimenting with finding one.
I just have too many things that I want to get done and all of them are equally shiny and goal-worthy. The problem is as soon as I set down some firm resolutions on one aspect, another one pops up that seems incredibly more important and I switch targets. If I’m writing, I get caught up in art. If I’m trying to exercise more, eating better distracts me. If I’m cleaning I end up organizing (which are not at all the same thing!). This is very much a lather-rinse-repeat cycle, so I start a thousand projects and finish none of them.
I’ve had lots of very well meant advice about picking one thing and focusing on doing only that… but my brain doesn’t work that way (at all). So it’s time to try something different. Instead I’m going to create a list of the one thing in each category and then try to create trigger points during my day that will remind me to work on them.
Building on my log for April’s Camp NaNoWriMo, I’m going to spend the next few weeks doing some habit forming experimentation and tracking over on this page.
Will it work? Who knows! But at least it’s movement in the right direction… 🙂
…Except when you wander off for over a decade and fall out of the habit.
I’ve been slowly moving my childhood things out of my Mom’s house and one of the very last boxes was all of my stories back to when I was tiny and was armed with crayons. Seeing all those hardcopy stories combined with the push I was doing to get all of my files and photos safe into Google Docs made me step back and realize just how much stuff I’ve written (and drawn) over the years.
And oddly, most of it isn’t here.
Going by the blog, I started writing in 2005 and have only a small handful of poems and no fanfiction at all to my name. There’s no comic strips or picture books, no stick figure horses off having adventures. No stumbling learning curve from naive novice up to naive ammature.
Which isn’t good enough.
So I’m going to sit down and start focusing on making this blog my real home on the web. That means plenty of old content mixed in with the new, but I hope you enjoy the ride! 🙂 (I’d keep it to just Flashback Fridays, but honestly I have too much stuff!)
I had good intentions, I did, but things got so crazy so quickly that I just lost track of everything beyond ‘get up, go to work, come home, sleep’. I was so far into the tunnel vision that I thought I hadn’t accomplished much this year until I started making the list.
Part of that was because I didn’t accomplish a single thing on my Twelve Things list of resolutions. I did attempt several of them, so I’m giving myself partial credit!
I played World of Warcraft (and Diablo, and Firefall, etc.) while walking on a Treadmill for a little over three years. It was fun, I was in better shape than I’d been for quite some time, but then the treadmill broke…
It seemed like a simple fix, but after I replaced the drive belt the walking belt started randomly skipping. It’s hard enough to walk and game without having to deal with the ‘ground’ lurching around! After much YouTube tutorial watching and tinkering, I gave up and meant to get a professional to fix it some time after we moved.
Which was roughly a year ago.
So why am I finally getting around to setting my treadmill gaming rig back up?
One of my goals for this year was to ‘win’ one of the Six Week Challenge rounds over at the Nerd Fitness Rebellion. It went about as well as most New Year’s Resolutions are wont to go… but I realized it’s still something I want to do in 2016.
(Plus I noticed I was getting traffic from the Treadmill Gaming subreddit every now and then and felt guilty I wasn’t keeping up the fight.)
The next Nerd Fitness Challenge starts January 4th and my goal is to have the gaming rig ready to go so cross your fingers and wish me luck! 🙂
Back in 2004 a very rowdy shepherd mix puppy made her way into our lives and on Saturday she quietly left us again.
You never know quite what you are going to get when you bring home a pound puppy, but we won the SPCA lotto with Ginger. She might have been a lovable bundle of puppy stupid, but Ginger quickly convinced us that she wasn’t just a dog– she was people.
She was a Dog Who Knew Things, you see. She knew when it was Time For Bed and when it was Time For Dinner and that you always (always!) had to bring your stuffed animal to the back door when you wanted to go out. She knew that she could lick near your face, but not on it; that back doors were open season, but she couldn’t go out the front door without a leash; and she knew when we left for work and when we got home… but most of all she knew she was a People.
My brain is an interesting place to live sometimes. For the most part the two of us have worked out an uneasy truce somewhat akin to a very tired parent and a cranky two year-old.
For various reasons this week was one of the bad ones. So I let it dictate what color socks it was going to wear, what kind of ice cream to have for dinner, what order M&M colors needed to be eaten in, and tried to find it all amusing.
In return I get to function as a mostly normal adult until the good days roll back around (as they always do)– it’s not a bad brain, it’s just needs things to be Just So sometimes.
And it’s worth it, dealing with every weird quirk and strange sideway hop, because from that grows everything else I am.
On sunny, windy days I walk out for lunch, squint into the sky, unfurl imaginary wings and soar.
I can sing songs that didn’t exist until I picked the first note and lyrics that tumble into place in rhythm with my footbeats to be forgotten five minutes after I start walking.
Universes rise and fall on those walks. Dreams shiver into being, are torn apart and are rebuilt, a thousand variations of what could be, might be, reworked into stories that are filed away for future use.
I can be normal, but sometimes I just have to not be.